Daddy's Girl

One day she'll realize that I actually gave birth to her. Until then...

And then there's our conversation yesterday:
Emmy:  Hey Mom, can I have a piece of chocolate if I finish all of my lunch?
Me:  Okay, it's a deal.
Emmy:  Oh Mommy I love you so much!!!
Me:  I love you too.  Would you still love me if I had said no to the chocolate?
Emmy:  No.

"Would you like some help ventilating your house?"

Dear Makers of LouAna Pure Coconut Oil:
Perhaps you would consider increasing the font size of the "caution" label that states your oil will burn and smoke incessantly at hot temperatures.  Some of us cooking novices don't know this and don't have the time to thoroughly examine your container before trying to make a little dinner for the fam.  I thank you, the family thanks you and our local fire department thanks you for your time.
Christa

Dear ADT Security Company:
So sorry that I didn't answer your call and you had to needlessly send out the fire department.  It is kind of challenging to hear the telephone ring when our FIRE ALARM WON'T GO OFF!!! 
Peace and Merriment,
Christa

Unintended Break

So, here's a little photo montage of what all was going on during our broken computer hiatus...

First was Halloween.  Emmy was of course a DRAGON!



Practicing her "RARRR" as I applied her facepaint.



We did a little trick-or-treating.

Rosa insisted on bringing a frisbee.



Rosa enjoyed her first Twix...

 ...with our Swedish manny.

Emmy learned how to draw a face!

  No really, look closely.



Rosa took up a little ballet...

 and smoking crayolas.

Emmy hijacked the camera often.


We Thanksgivinged at Angie and Mike's.

  Much to Dawn and Steve's surprise.

We FINALLY met sweet Henry, and got to hang with couzy Harrison.


And Angie found THE DRESS!!!  Sorry, those pics are classified.



Her father's daughter

After repeatedly calling for Emmy this morning to come back and get dressed, she finally wandered in. 
Me:  How many times did I call for you to come back here?
Emmy:  Five
Me:  Then what were you waiting for?
Emmy:  ...Number 6

A moment inside a 3 year olds' head

Me:  Hey Emmy, what do you want to be when you grow up?
Emmy: (shrugging her shoulders) Umm...I think I'll just be Emmy...but taller.



"In a few years, I'll outsmart you all"



In lieu of Halloween

Because we haven't gotten the pics downloaded yet.  When I say "we" I mean Drew, who has sole knowledge of how to do these sorts of techy things that I feel would waste the space in my brain that I reserve for more important things like useless movie quotes and the exact caffeine content of a Starbucks latte (learned during my first pregnancy - and no, I'm not Mother). 
Instead I offer up a little "musical snack" if you will...(that one was all for you Drew)
Behold the famous "Flute-dance dance"

The Power of Jinx

No sooner had I typed that very word in response to Drew's email inquiry regarding naps, Emmy started moaning, groaning, whining, hooting like an owl, louder, Louder, LOUDER!!! because she did not want to nap anymore, effectively waking Rosa up from the first almost normal-sized nap she's had in over a week.  Rosa is teething, no not teething, TEETHING!  Like some mix of the exorcist and the grumpy old men in the balcony on The Muppets.  Seriously, she's standing in her crib booing and throwing tomatoes at me while chewing the paint off her crib rail all while I'm softly singing lullabies.  Why oh why Great Lord of the Jinx?  WWWHHHHHYYYYY?????

Conversations with Emmy

This morning as she was helping me get ready/giving herself some Ruby Red lips for voting in style:
Me:  Can you please pass me the cheek stain?
Emmy:  Here you are (got it right)
Me:  Wow, that's impressive, maybe you'll be a makeup artist when you're older.
Emmy:  Thanks, but actually I want to be a mail person.
Me:  Why do you think that job would be fun?
Emmy: (implied "duh" tone) Umm..because I like mail.


As we were driving home from voting:
Emmy:  Why isn't the car moving?
Me:  Because we are at a red light.  Do you remember what a red light means?
Emmy: Stop!  And a green light means hurry up and go already!
Me:  Exactly.


After playing at her kitchen set for a while:
Emmy:  Now don't touch those cookies, they're going to be very hot and I don't want to see you anywhere near that stove! (Love hearing myself quoted back to me;))
Me:  Oh, I wouldn't dream of it.
Emmy:  Well, you can dream about it, just don't do it.

Early onset manipulation

"But Mommy, yoooouuuuu'rrrrre the best cleaner in the whole wooorrrrrllldd!"
Emmy age 3 - said after I asked her to clean up the Pirates Booty she just made "rain" over Rosa's head.

"Oh was I speeding Officer...Pretty?

 

                       *10 points if you can name that TV show reference.

On lockdown at Target

Know what's worse than being stuck at Target with 2 kids in the dark due to a freaky rain/wind storm that knocked down a nearby power line?
Having your potty trained 3 year old tell you she's "gotta go now!".  Yep, holding your 3 yr. old over a toilet in one arm with your 1 yr. old in the other arm in a dark creepy public restroom stall at Target.

On the upside, we had to dash to the store because we have been "Boo-ed".  We found a cute little Halloween basket with tons of toys and treats outside our door this morning, with a note basically saying to "pass it on" to 2 other neighbors who do not have an "I've been Boo-ed" sign on their door, like we have now.  Have fun is that???  Our neighborhood rocks!!!!!  Totally worth navigating a public restroom in the dark.

Frozen sausage popsicle

Takers?  No?  Really?  Alrighty then, more for me.

Almost every day while I have the freezer door open for meal prep Rosa stealthily slides in and grabs the box of Applegate Farms chicken sausage (an Emmy and Rosa fave), pulls out a sausage or two and then happily scoots around the house licking her delicious meat popsicle while I am cooking (don't worry, they're fully cooked).  Gross, yes.  Effective entertainment, absolutely.  Yes, I could perhaps move the box higher up in the freezer to avoid this situation, but I'm not going to for the following reasons:
1.  Sometimes whatever keeps her occupied while I'm cooking (short of knife juggling, which I'm sure  is not too far down on her to do list) is just fine by me.
2.  I'll admit it, it's always entertaining to me. 
Mange!

Reasons why I don't bake with Emmy very often anymore

Exhibit A

Baking cupcakes without the dry mix is surprisingly challenging. 

Pumpkin Patchin'

The other weekend we got our spooky on and started prepping for the big Trick or Treating weekend (I would call it Halloween, but it's really all about the candy, non?)!  Drew and I aren't super into excessive holiday decorating (hi Mom!), but now that we own 2 littles, and are new kids on the block (oh oh o-oh oh) in a neighborhood that is totally into decorating, we had to step it up.  We went to a Pumpkin Farm not too far from us called "Blooms and Berries".  They had all kinds of festivities (corn maze, sunflower walk, egg toss etc...) but the girls were only interested in playing among the pumpkins.

"Okay, these are the ones we want!"

 

"Oh yes, now I see...that is a fine looking pumpkin"

It's called quality control people

Emmy preferred the pumpkins to be single file.

At home,Emmy wanted to decorate the pumpkins rather than carve them, which was fine by us, less work less mess.  Sort of.

2 small children plus 2 black markers...genius!

Oh wait, you have just a little something on your...

We hung a few decorations.  Behold Disco Skeleton.

Umm...because he's AWESOME.

 Emmy and Drew made some ghosts filled with berries from her "berry picking tree".

A well fed ghost

And we got some costumes.  SNEAK PEEK...

Emmy only likes costumes when she can make this noise. RARRRRR!

"You look like a pink nightmare!"  

 

Looking forward to Saturday night!!!

"Meee, I waaant a huuuula hooooop"

Alvin, Simon, Theodore...doo do do doo do do doo

Genealogy

1 born and raised Hoosier + 1 born and raised Buckeye x 2 Hoosier alums does not = a Buckeye fan.

Oh come on, you didn't really think I'd post that, did you?

Sorry Grammy, E's not jumping on your bandwagon;) 
                           

"Once upon a time there was a boy named Mom"

That is the first line of the story Emmy "read" to me from the book she snagged off of Drew's dresser (The End of Poverty) this morning.  I still couldn't make out the second line, even after making her repeat the story dozens of times ("Mommy this is the LAST TIME OKAY?!"), but it ended with "and then she had a big sister named Rosa.  The end".  Awesome.
She insisted on bringing this book to the mall when we went to run errands later, and sat in the stroller "reading" quietly as we walked around.  A lot of people would watch her, then look up at me and I was all "ya, what's your kid reading...Goodnight Moon?"

Heatin' up the neurons

On high alert

Look out world.  As of this morning Rosa "the rebel" Lloyd has started cruising all over the house.  She's also climbing on couches, cuddlers and coffee tables (oh my!) and flailing herself off of them with sheer abandon and the wild look in her eyes of an adrenaline junkie, or someone purposefully trying to unnerve their mother.
Consequently, and on a completely separate note I'm sure, I noticed this morning that she might have my Mom's smile. 
Lil' Bill with a lil' bit o' Betty mixed in?  That is trouble my friends.  T. R. O. U. B. L. E.

Casing the deck for dangerous activities later.

 

 

Practicing triple side somersault dismount, with a grin to distract you.

PS - why are my kids always in pajamas?

I mean, really?

In the amount of time it took me to pour myself a bowl of cereal for lunch today (I know, I'm a total foodie), Rosa consumed an entire banana and 1 slice of Kraft Singles.  Really.
Is that even normal??
I wasn't watching, so for all I know she shoved the whole banana down at once a la the freaky hot dog eating competitors.  I think I will give her a belly massage before nap time to try to smush it up a little;)

Sometimes I make her do tricks for seconds.

Workin' it off baby, workin' it off

Oh dear

So, last night mid-dinner, Emmy got up to go to the potty and returned buck naked running into the room yelling "surprise!".  She followed up with a little dance, a modified twist if you will, with a little extra booty shaking.
I put a blanket around her for the rest of dinner as she had no intention of getting dressed, and later was asked (in the strangely monotone voice of someone you might meet in a dark alley) "hey...wanna see my body?" Blanket opened.  "TA DA!"
She followed this act up with a session of licking everyone in the room.  Rosa got it the worst, much to her enjoyment, with a full on pulling out of the ear to get the crevice behind. 
Drew and I agreed that this does not bode well for her college years.

"Yes officer, we'll pay the bail...this time"

Aspirations

This morning during an errand run, Emmy informed me that she would like to be a "truck driver when I'm older".  I commended her for her early work ethic, and then asked her what the rest of us should be. She said that "Rosa can be a mailman", "Daddy can be a whale fisher" (really?) and "Mommy, you can be a ghost!" 
I'm pretty sure I got the short end of the stick there...on life insurance policy alone.

"Oh, I'm delivering...delivering STYLE"

"My good friend Harrison"

That's what Emmy calls her cousin Harrison when she talks about him...which is always.
Me:  "How about we go to the duck pond this morning?"
Emmy:  "Okay...is my good friend Harrison going to be there?"

"Yeah that's right.  The ladies loves me..and I loves the ladies"

*Disclaimer* If you are over the age of 12 and/or over 100 lbs.,  don't even consider riding that slide.  I still have unspeakable injuries.

Who can blame her really.  I mean, check out that mug!  We are coming to play at your rockin playground soon!!!

I told them to smile...fake laugh...love it.  A paparazzo's dream.  And then there's Posh Spice.

Before my cup of coffee

Do you know what is reeeaaallllly hard to clean out of carpet at 7:52am?  A nice hot bowl of uneaten Quaker oatmeal. 

Wonder twin powers activate!  Turn into the form of a HOLY DISASTER.

I would like to take this moment to thank, with all my heart, my sister and Mike for getting engaged...and consequently giving me a really good reason to be gone most of Saturday (hello gown shopping!).  I'm super happy for you guys, I'm just a little bit happier for me right now;)

"911 state your emergency"

So, Rosa called 911 this morning.  I was making a breakfast sandwich for Emmy, who had already eaten a whole banana and an ENTIRE package of yogurt melts.  I knew Rosa had the phone and was happily pushing buttons and babbling when I heard someone speak back to her.  At first I thought she had somehow dialed some sort of customer service, so I didn't hurry over (hey, they waste a lot of my time so...) but, then I heard a very serious voice asking my 13 month old to STATE YOUR EMERGENCY.  Yikes.  It took at least 5 different questions to assure this fellow that we were in fact fine.  I figure we were just a few minutes away from a police visit. Good morning indeed.

Yes officer, that's the one. 

A Portrait of Nana

Photo credit to upcoming abstract photographer Emerson Davis.

Happy Birthday!!!!  We love you! XOXOXO

Pajama Party Friday!!!

Friday afternoons at our place are "Pajama Party Friday!!!".  Fridays are only spoken of with this title. We get excited for this moment all week long, really, including me.  Following afternoon naps, the ladies change into our jammies, set up a big "floor party" area with blankets, pillows and A LOT of animal friends and pick out a movie to watch during dinner.  It marks the fun of the upcoming weekend when we all get to be together.  Cheesy perhaps, but that's okay, it works for us.

I await the day in preschool that Emmy will inevitably recite the days of the week as "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Pajama Party Friday, Saturday..."

Emmy picks out Drew's ensemble and lays it out for his arrival.

Happy weekend!

Quote of the day

"I 'm going to use this flashlight to see my hiccups"
Emmy - age 3
Said while trying to shove the light end of a flashlight into her mouth. (Don't worry Mom, it didn't fit).

A day in the life...

A suspiciously low key morning:  stroller walk around the neighborhood, everyone ate without protest at lunch.  I should have known better...
3:20pm - Emmy wakes up screaming "mommy" repeatedly after an hour (of a normally 2 hour joint nap) waking Rosa up far too early for anything good to happen.
3:25pm - change Rosa to see that she has a terrible diaper rash, presumably from the Indian food I let her eat off my plate at lunch.  What?  She liked it.
3:35pm - letting Rosa air out on my lap while we play in her room.  Starts to pee.  I quickly close my legs tight to catch all of the pee in my pants as opposed to the rug (motherly instinct?).
3:40pm - change out of pee clothes, clean up Rosa and let her air out on our bed.  Emmy tries to give her a sippy cup.  I tell her to wait until I have Rosa diapered, just in case.  Emmy doesn't wait.  Rosa starts to drink and immediately begins peeing on our freshly laundered sheets.  Grab her and quickly get yet more pee on my freshly changed clothes.  
3:45pm - Emmy skips happily to the "time out" chair for disobeying my directions. Take all linens and pee clothes to laundry room. 
4:00pm - see Mr. Puddy lurking outside from an earlier escape.  Run outside shoeless to catch him, stepping on various thorny weeds.  Emmy stays inside to "signal" him to come in with the beeper on some play car keys. 
4:01pm - Mr. Puddy runs off. 
4:02pm - Cheerfully wave hi to some neighbors who just heard me cursing the day we got a cat.
4:03pm - Walk back inside through a wet spot to find Emmy removing her pee clothes (she's in BIG GIRL underwear).  Ask her why she didn't use the potty.  "Because I was having too much fun helping you find Mr. Puddy."
5:50pm - Hand both kids to Drew the minute he walks in the door. 

What this angel? (she had just used her magic wand to "wish" for a sip of  Daddy's Pepsi

Filling up for more ammunition

And so it begins...

So, I have succumbed to the urge to go ahead and give this a try.  It is so NOT in my nature to have a blog.  Anyone who knows me knows that I am not very technologically savvy or even interested.  I literally use my cell for emergencies only, I have never texted in my life, and I have a facebook account that I have maybe looked at once. But, I do appreciate the idea that this could be some sort of scrapbook of the girls childhood.  So, in an effort to document the daily goings on of our little world, and to please my father-in-law who requests more frequent pics of the girls (hi Bill!) I will give this a shot.  Here's hoping I make at least one more post;)  Above is one of my favorite pictures of the girls - just a random moment between the 2 of them that makes all the insanity of having 2 little ones worth every second.